Boob Job Chicken

My breast surgeon recommended that I go see a plastic surgeon to understand what my options are for a boob job.  I have always had tiny boobs and have thought about getting a boob job but never really executed on it.  Bigger boobs was appealing but the thought of how much it will cost, surgery, and all the possible complications, I just never went for it.  However in my current circumstances I have to get surgery, my insurance will cover the bill, so why not at least understand more about it.  So I go to the consultation with a few of my friends.

I meet with the breast surgeon, who does a quick exam and then goes over 3 different options.  Lumpectomy, which is just the removal of my lump.  He explained that because my boobs are small the surgery will be noticeable and that he won’t be able to successfully reconstruct it.  I’m still young and dating, so I don’t think this is really an option if I’m going to have a misshaped boob.

The other option is a double mastectomy.  This would be his best option for symmetry. However it is a major surgery and will be an overnight in the hospital.  To do breast augmentation (boob job!), he will need to place explanders in my boobs before he does the implants.  Then I will visit him weekly to get an injecton of saline, which is a needle that goes through my boob and into the expanders.  This is to stretch the skin and later he will do a second surgery of putting in the real implant.

The next option is to do a single mastectomy.  This isn’t an option that the breast surgeon went over, but it would be only my left boob would be removed while my right will be untouched.   One of the side effects of a mastectomy is you loose nipple sensation, which if I did this my right boob would still work.  He could do reconstruction and augmentation.  There will be a difference in the two boobs because he won’t be able to get perfect symmetry.  So he shows me some pictures and shows where the flaws are.  I wouldn’t have noticed the flaws if he hadn’t pointed it out.  However I’m not excited about the idea of having a new flaw even if I am likely the only person that would notice.

There was a lot of information and at the end I felt like I was hit by a truck.  This is all a big deal, I am forever going to be changed.  I try and make the boob job a silver lining, but I really would prefer to keep my itty bitty titties.  I want to crawl into a ball and cry.  I don’t.  Crying in public is not my style, so just listen to my friends chat about the process as the reality of all of this washes over me.  I breathe and look for the positive in all this.  I will be getting a boob job, I will not be getting a lumpectomy, and trust this doctor that any flaws I have will be something only he and I will notice.  As I talk to my friends about it I get more and more comfortable with this and the fear dissipates.  This feels much better than if I had let myself cry, I am joking and actually getting excited to get a BOOB JOB!!!

So why not make some good old boob job chicken.  Okay, there is no such thing, but I hate my transitions from cancer to food and the title made me smile.  I’m actually making chicken long rice, which I will now affectionally think of as boob job chicken. Chicken long rice is a dish that I love. I t is based on a Chinese dish, but is commonly served during a traditional Hawaiian luau.  It is not actually made out of rice but from a bean curd noodle, which I have always known as cellophane noodles.

The first thing I do is braise the chicken in a sesame sauce.


While the chicken is cooking soak the bean threads.



The chicken is done and is ready to fall off the bone.


I shred the chicken and discard the bones and add the meat back to the sauce so it doesn’t dry out.  Cook the noodles in broth adding garlic and ginger.  Then add the chicken with the sesame sauce and green onions.  Toss together and it is ready.




Chicken Long Rice (Boob Job Chicken)
  • 2 tablespoon sesame oil, divided
  • 4 bone-in chicken thighs, skinned
  • 1/4 cup + 4 tablespoons soy sauce
  • 2 tablespoons light brown sugar
  • 2 tablespoons fresh orange juice
  • 5 teaspoons hoisin sauce
  • 3 tablespoons minced peeled fresh ginger, divided
  • 5  garlic cloves, minced, divided
  • 1 tablespoon sesame oil
  • dash pepper
  • 2 tablespoons vegetable oil
  • 6-8 oz. sliced mushrooms
  • 2-4 chopped green onions
  • 10 oz long rice (cellophane noodles)
  • 8 oz chicken broth
  1. Heat 1 tablespoon sesame oil in a large dutch oven over medium-high heat.
  2.  Add chicken; cook 4 minutes on each side or until golden.
  3. Combine 1/4 cup soy sauce, brown sugar, orange juice,  hoisin sauce, 1 tablespoon minced ginger, and 2 garlic cloves minced; pour over chicken.
  4. Cover and cook on low for 2 1/2 hours or until chicken is tender.
  5. Shred chicken and return to the broth.
  6. Cover and soak long rice in cold water for 30 minutes.  Cut into eight lengths.
  7. Place wok over medium heat and add 1 tablespoon sesame oil.
  8. Add mushrooms, green onions, long rice, chicken broth, chicken, and remainder of ingredients.  Simmer until hot, stirring often – about 3 minutes.



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